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Person a is an "older" baal teshuva (30-40 years plus) and grew up knowing he was a kohen. Being a kohen means that at his age there are not likely to be any baalas teshuva women he can marry and marrying someone who comes from a known "frum" family is often an obstacle and not prefered. Is it better this person look for a reason not to be a kohen such as being declared a chalal or should he just wait patiently and hope that one day he might find someone to marry?

Laser123
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    Related: https://judaism.stackexchange.com/questions/46019/are-there-any-organizations-or-support-groups-that-help-older-unmarried-kohanim – Yishai Jul 13 '17 at 22:40
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    Wouldn't it just be best to seek the truth and not try to make the results be one way? – Double AA Jul 13 '17 at 22:42
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    Why shouldn't a BT marry an FFB? That seems somewhat backward to me, as an FFB Kohen myself. – Noach MiFrankfurt Jul 13 '17 at 22:45
  • I tend to mostly agree with you and yichus is less emphasized now than in the past but this doesn't change that there is a bias. In addition to social bias there is also the concern of not wanting to marry someone who might have been a ben/bas nida – Laser123 Jul 13 '17 at 23:39
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    He should have the emunah that Hashem has the perfect one waiting for him. (Sotah 1a) And then he should wait. – ezra Jul 14 '17 at 01:54
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    Action is not a controduction to emunah and doing nothing would be relying on a miracle... – Laser123 Jul 14 '17 at 02:24
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    @ezra maybe hashem set this situation up so he'd check and realize he's not really a kohen – Double AA Jul 14 '17 at 03:01
  • There can be good personal compatibility issues about why a BT and FFB isn't a good Shidduch from the BT's perspective. Past life experience would be quite different and socialization into the FFB world would be kind of limited. For example would an FFB woman mind that her husband struggles over basic Hebrew during Kiddush and Havdala? Has no yeshiva experience to refer back to? Will the FFB spouse deal well with inlaws who are irreligious, perhaps even hostile? etc. etc. – Yishai Jul 14 '17 at 13:20
  • @Yishai Baalei teshuva in our community almost always go to yeshiva, and you'd better believe they learn to make kiddush before they are married. – SAH Aug 30 '17 at 09:51

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