Fred and George turned to each other and said together, "Wow — we're identical!"

"I dunno though, I think I'm still better looking," said Fred, examining his reflection in the kettle.

HERMIONE (snapping fingers) Hey! she's only interested in you because she thinks you're the Chosen One. You know that, right?

HARRY But I am the Chosen One.

HERMIONE cocks her head at him, exasperated [and smacks a piece of paper at HARRY's head].

HARRY [Whoa. Whoa. Okay. Sorry.] Kidding. I'll just ask someone I like. Someone cool.

MCGONAGALL Now, place your right hand on my waist.

RON Where?

MCGONAGALL My waist.

He does so and a wolf whistle comes from the crowd.

MCGONAGALL Now bend your arm. Mr. Filch . . .

The music starts.

MCGONAGALL One, two, three, one, two, three, one, two, three.

HARRY (to the Weasley twins) Oi! Never gonna let him forget this, are you?

TWINS Never.

jK ROWLINGS CHEEK-