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Ok I understand why Adultery is haram because it can destroy marriages and families, which are the basic unit to stability in society and that adultery can have costly, negative impacts such as divorce. However, what about fornication? From the people that I’ve spoken to who have fornicated (May Allah guide them) fornication has brand nothing but happiness. Also for others that I have heard from it seems that fornicating has helped strengthen relationships and the list of good things that it has brought to them seems quite long. With advancing technology I’m sure there are ways that can or in the future may completely destroy any chances of unwanted pregnancies without causing harm to the humans body. What are the negative impacts and what is the wisdom behind fornication being haram?

Note: I know fornication is haram so no point of simply including evidence that it is I want to know why and the wisdom behind it, thank you.

  • Thousands years ago, dating didn't exist. Fornication for the unweds didn't guarantee longterm relationship or marriage. It incurred ruins for unwedded women, while men evaded responsibilities for impregnating them. Today for Muslims, I think chaperoned dating would be agreeable. – Rita Geraghty Dec 01 '19 at 11:32
  • But what about fornication because even with negative impacts such as unwanted pregnancies there is always abortions and other things of the like. A thousand years ago it must have been a lot more problematic but now it isn’t and the sex drive people have is mad. Fornication may help them control themselves and as stated in the question it has brought happiness to the people I have spoke to. –  Dec 01 '19 at 15:43
  • @ L o a d i n g, do you honestly believe in sex without emotional ties? Every action that you take always has consequences. Always remember that. There is more to life than just sex. Are you already bored with your marriage and is that why you want fornication outside fornication? – Rita Geraghty Dec 01 '19 at 22:14
  • Who said I’m married? And also it’s not like you can’t have emotional ties outside marriage. Also I know that every action I take has consequences I want to know the wisdom behind banning fornication and I want an answer following the guidelines I set in my description. –  Dec 01 '19 at 22:53
  • Obviously, you haven't seen the immense heartbreak, etc. that results as well, and have only seen a rose colored picture. – The Z Dec 02 '19 at 01:47
  • @Loading... Responsibility, morals, self-respect and security matter more than promiscuity. You might want your fun by casual sex, but you troubles upon yourself. – Rita Geraghty Dec 02 '19 at 04:16
  • I’m not saying I want to fornicate myself however I want to know why it is haram and what the wisdom is behind it. Of course there are responsibilities and that is why most people take extreme measures before doing these things so they acknowledge and cover responsibility, also how does morals and self respect/security correlate with fornication? –  Dec 02 '19 at 16:02
  • I edit my answer to clarify some points. Let me know if you have any questions – Thaqalain Dec 02 '19 at 16:56
  • @TheZ but then againa rent we seeing a hellish picture all the time? – M.A May 24 '20 at 01:44
  • @RitaGeraghty but that can also be achieved outside marriage – M.A May 24 '20 at 01:45

2 Answers2

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First of all, know that any reasoning given about Allah's rulings is only an educated guess and not a definitive answer unless Allah clearly gives an answer. The only sure statement we can make regarding this is that Allah forbade it so humans are not allowed to do it.

That being said, the possible reason for this being haram is the same as that of adultery. It ruins the family unit.

How?

It cheapens what is meant to be gotten through marriage alone. Allah created men and women so they could be partners to one another. Giving intimacy outside that partnership means that people value the partnership less.

For a simple demonstration of this, look at the countries where this deed has become widespread. You will notice the following things:

  • Age of marriage is higher, meaning people spend less time in the partnership (marriage) Allah created for them. This happens because people know they can get intimacy in casual relationships and uncommitted ones.

  • Divorce rate is higher and remarriage is low. Again, this happens because people know they can get intimacy without marriage.

  • Rate of unmarried people is higher. Same reason.

All this combined creates a society that is uncommitted with regards to marriage. This is completely morally wrong, and causes among many other effects, low birth rates, people developing less responsibility, and people thinking more about inappropriate things in general.

And this is not even getting into the psychological problems. If people lead a promiscuous lifestyle in their developing years (teens and twenties), that leads to their brain getting used to it physically and psychologically. This means they will forever be stuck with such a mindset even if they are able to inhibit and control it. This causes nothing but problems in the marriage later on if one person is unable to control their desires.

And it is not even as if one can claim that the people who will get adverse effects will not take part in it. Opening the door to this causes almost every person in that society to be drowned in these problems. The culture itself changes to encourage it. I will let you look up the statistics of how massively prevalent it becomes in a short amount of time yourself.

The Z
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  • What about people who committed to one relationship throughout their lives and had that relationship before marriage too? T –  Dec 03 '19 at 14:09
  • @Loading... Then, what exactly is the point of them not getting married in the first place instead of keeping it later? The reason that is forbidden is because you do not know the future. You can only say with hindsight that they will stay in that relationship throughout their lives. So, if they want to give proof of their commitment, get married. – The Z Dec 03 '19 at 14:29
  • Age and legal age for marriage, some may have relationships and sex under legal marriage age but after may be able to. –  Dec 03 '19 at 15:24
  • @Loading... If they are unable to get married, they are unable to show their commitment. It is as simple as that. That being said, there are no restrictions under Islam of age to get married, so if it is possible, they can have the Islamic marriage before the legal marriage of the country. However, if that is not possible, then they cannot show their commitment. Honestly, they are not going to die if they wait a few years. – The Z Dec 03 '19 at 15:36
  • Yes I know but I am saying that given the circumstances, they want to commit but are not legally allowed to die to the age required (in the country) and what if they die before they can go above the age requires –  Dec 03 '19 at 16:50
  • @Loading... Again, at that point, it is nothing but wishful thinking. There is no commitment until you actually commit. Talk to any person doing this and they will tell you the same thing that they will be together for their whole life. But, in a few years that is all gone. If they die, they die. It is not like having intimacy is a right that we need to guarantee people before death. There is the afterlife after all. – The Z Dec 03 '19 at 17:17
  • Ok thanks for clarification. –  Dec 03 '19 at 18:39
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Fornication is haram. However similar to how sex with a non-mahram is haram, and how it becomes halal with Islam marriage, there are ways to do something similar to fornication but it be halal.

The reasons it's pushed back against are:

  • While is also very very pro sex and doesn't want to forbid us from natural sex drives, it's also a very modest religion and has guidelines to solve lustful desires and haram sex
  • While it's also very pro child and pro family. Children shouldn't ever be passed around as packages to other families in case of uncommitted parents. Anything that can reduce that possibility is worthy of merit.
  • Islam is against abortion after 4 months where the fetus can sense pain. So reducing the chances of that is also full of merit.
  • Also your note on Advancing technologies is not as significant as you think. It hasn't happened yet, not everyone can afford that advancing technologies, currently everyone can afford a condom, but they don't use it...
  • Fornication is not considerate of women's rights e.g. mahr + the permission of father is ignored, iddah is not held and women can be used by lustful men.
  • last but not least, we're not just a body. We have a soul. Do you want to just have sex with anyone, like just do a tinder date night, do your thing and be done?! Doesn't that feel a little emotionless? Islam tries to push us as much as it can away from this path, and instead push us towards a permanent marriage path.

There needs to be a set of guidelines for what is to happen when the parents ultimately have a child or the rights of the women are to be protected with mahr and permission of her father. Also men will be protected when the relationship is through a contract.

Yet, if certain rules are followed, Islam does allow a very very very strict version of women sleeping with men outside marriage.

For more on that see How is Mutah different from prostitution (from a non-Muslim point of view)?

Thaqalain
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    You are equating Mutah with fornication (Zina) and considering it "outside" marriage? – UmH Dec 02 '19 at 15:52
  • What I mean in my answer is: It's not haram, just like sex with a non-mahram becomes halal through a few words ie halal marriage. I've made an edit. Is it clear now? – Thaqalain Dec 02 '19 at 15:57
  • So you are saying that fornication taken with precaution is permissible? May I ask where you got that from because I haven’t heard a single person say that fornication is halal up to now. –  Dec 02 '19 at 22:43
  • @Loading... Not exactly. Just that sexual activity is halal if you’re married or do Mutah. See the answer I linked to at the end. – Thaqalain Dec 02 '19 at 22:48
  • @Loading... I’d like to hear your thoughts. were the reasons for fornication being haram reasonable? – Thaqalain Dec 03 '19 at 00:32
  • @Honey hmm in sunni hadith, Mutah is not allowed. why is that so different? – Rafid Dec 03 '19 at 07:50
  • @Rafid That's not the topic of this question. But for me that's also a question, that how come it was permissible at the time of the prophet and later altered? You can open a new question or search for it. I've already answered in a different question as to why Mutah is permissible – Thaqalain Dec 03 '19 at 16:25
  • @Honey thats like alcohol, it was permissible then changed. As far as I know shiism is not allowing alcohol at the present time. – Rafid Dec 03 '19 at 16:31
  • @Rafid Right. Though alcohol became haram at the time of the prophet not after. Mutah didn't become haram at the time of the prophet – Thaqalain Dec 03 '19 at 16:36
  • @Honey Well in sunni hadith the mutah is changed at the time of prophet. maybe the major difference is because our hadith is different. – Rafid Dec 03 '19 at 16:43