I made a promise to Allah that I shall never speak to a person in college and it was a boy. But that person is sincerely asking for forgiveness by sending messages and calls. I kept ignoring, without replying should I reply saying that I forgive that person or not because I promised Allah that I will never talk to that person ever again. I have not replied or anything.
So if I send a messages saying that I forgave will it be a major sin and will Allah punish me?
The same thing happened to me brother, and I asked some muftis about this. And they said the solution is to pay compensation of breaking promise with Allah
and start talking with that person, this is only solution. Because it is not allowed for a muslim to not talk with his brother for more than 3 days. In one hadees it says that prayer of this person is not accepted after it. Until they start talking again.
Besides vows of this kind must not be taken in first place, because they are same as vowing to do something wrong.
Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 3268 Narrated by Abdullah ibn Amr ibn al-'As The Messenger of Allah (saws) said: An oath or a vow about something over which a human being has no control, or to disobey Allah, or to break ties of relationship is not binding. If anyone takes an oath and then considers something else better than it, one should give it up, and do what is better; for leaving it is its atonement.
For details read here.
The compensation of breaking oath is:
“Allaah will not punish you for what is unintentional in your oaths, but He will punish you for your deliberate oaths; for its expiation (a deliberate oath) feed ten Masaakeen (poor persons), on a scale of the average of that with which you feed your own families, or clothe them or manumit a slave. But whosoever cannot afford (that), then he should fast for three days. That is the expiation for the oaths when you have sworn. And protect your oaths (i.e. do not swear much). Thus Allaah makes clear to you His Ayaat (proofs, evidences, verses, lessons, signs, revelations, etc.) that you may be grateful”
[al-Maa'idah 5:89]
It is not permissible to move to the option of fasting when one is able to feed or clothe poor persons or free a slave, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “But whosoever cannot afford (that), then he should fast for three days.” For details read here.
I also broke my oath in the end. And hope you will also do so.
I'm not sure, but I think we cannot suppose this as a canonical promise according to Shar', although this is better for you not to break it at least according to precaution. We can look at this issue by the aspect of lie too. In truth, we can suppose it as a lie if you do that, why? Because you have told God something before and you intend to do something else, then we can call it a lie too!
Of course the viewpoint of @Azam would be a suitable perspective too as she pointed out : Tell someone to convey your message, if that doesn't count as breaking the promise made to Allah.
Therefore you can use some of your friends in order to informing him if there is an important and necessary and halal issue that you must tell him in order to performing your promise.
