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I came across these posts:

After reading these and a couple of more posts on hinduism.stackexchange.com and Quora.com, a weird doubt comes to my mind.

  1. does Vedas, Shastras, Purana's or any other Grantha has any rules on whom to marry or whom not to marry? I seriously never came across any readings where it is written that you can marry your maternal uncle's daughter or paternal aunt's daughter (apart from the arjuna-subhadra story - please correct me if I'm wrong).
  2. If it is right or not a adharma to marry maternal uncle's (Mama) daughter, than why is it wrong to marry maternal aunt's (Masi) daughter? Is there any reference to this in Vedas or Shastras? There is a quarrel on this everywhere! But never a proper justification or logic...

I know this sounds very odd, even to me to be frank, but yeah! I need to know.

Note: I, myself, I'm against such marriages. So please, peace. Just tell me if Vedas and Shastras have this.

Ashish Srivastava
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    Yes dharmashastras like Manusmriti, Yajnavalkya Smriti, Baudhayana give rules as to whom one can Marry. And among them cousins are nowhere included. In fact on the fathers side 7 generations and mothers side five generations one can’t Marry. – Adiyarkku Mar 05 '21 at 15:22
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    @archit - Yes I agree - on the fathers side 7 generations and mothers side 3 generations one can’t Marry. I know it's also prohibited for Hindus even by Indian law. It's known as Sapinda relation. But that's not my question. Just like the Indian law has few specific points related to this, I expect a specific phrase, shloka our any story from our shastras which points about this. – Ashish Srivastava Mar 05 '21 at 17:09
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    You want the quote of Manusmriti, Yajnavalkya saying that you can’t marry in a Sapinda relation? – Adiyarkku Mar 05 '21 at 17:13
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    Yes! That would be really nice if I can get some quote/shloka from any of our shastras on it. – Ashish Srivastava Mar 06 '21 at 04:24
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    Well there would definitely be another question on this but I can’t find it so is a link to Manu with comparison to others right af the bottom: https://www.wisdomlib.org/hinduism/book/manusmriti-with-the-commentary-of-medhatithi/d/doc199777.html – Adiyarkku Mar 06 '21 at 06:01
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    Cool. No offense but it still doesn't answer the why part of my question. – Ashish Srivastava Mar 06 '21 at 09:50
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    No no please, none taken :). So the reason for this the genetic mix up. The male lineage is preserved in the gotra and until 7 generations it’ll be categorised as inbreeding. The kids produced would have some genetic defect. Same goes for 5 generations on the mother’s side. – Adiyarkku Mar 06 '21 at 11:09
  • Yeah about the kids and the genetic defects... I don't agree with that coz, you know, I don't wanna point out but many such marriages happen and without any defects. I hope you understood my point – Ashish Srivastava Mar 06 '21 at 11:25
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    there are 2 types of cousins - sagotra/sapinda and non-sagotra/sapinda. father's sister's son/daughter, and mother's brother's son/daughter are acceptable spouses. but this is only in dravida desh (below vindhyas), but not above it in aryavart @Adiyarkku – ram Feb 17 '23 at 16:33

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Yes, Smriti Shastras categorically says whom you can marry and whom you should not. For example,

Manu Smriti 11.171

On having had intercourse with one’s sister born of his father’s sister, or of his mother’s sister, or of his mother’s full brother,—one should perform the Cāndrāyaṇa.

Manu Smriti 11.172

A wise man should never take these three as his wife; being blood-relations, they are not fit to be married; because by marrying them, one sinks low.

Manu Smriti 3.5

She who is not a “sapiṇḍa” of one’s mother, not of the same “Gotra” as his Father, and who is not born of (unlawful) intercourse—has been recommended for marriage.

Manu Smriti 11.170

If one has had sexual intercourse with his uterine sister, or with the wife of his friend, or of his son, or with an unmarried maiden, or with a lowest-born woman,—he should perform the penance prescribed for the ‘violation of the Preceptor’s Bed.’

The answer to your second question is both are adharma. You can not marry the daughter of your maternal uncle or aunt as it is clear from verse 11.171-172.

Amritendu Mukhopadhyay
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    So that means what was followed by Arjuna-Shubadra was adharma? More importantly whatever is followed by the Yadava based clans in the Braja or those in the Dravida-Desha - i.e., inter/cross breeding amongst the maternal cousins - in strict scripture sense all of that is a heinous violation of the scriptures and a big adharma? – Vivikta Jun 17 '21 at 12:30
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    @Vivikta Baudhayana says in Dravida desha, one can do that. But beyond that geographic range, one should not follow that custom. – Amritendu Mukhopadhyay Jun 17 '21 at 13:39
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    @Vivikta your question is valid and important, and the answer is not easy. Even when Yudhishthira supported the marriage of Draupadi to the 5 brothers he simply gave the logic that "I feel it is Dharma, that's why it is Dharma" though it was not the norm. Something similar situation here also I guess. I am no expert. It is just my opinion. – Amritendu Mukhopadhyay Jun 17 '21 at 13:42
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    "Baudhayana says in Dravida desha, one can do that" - But why ?, People there have a different Biology or Spirituality ??. In any way, any marriage involving paternal or maternal ties will lead to an equal chance of "defective-gene-transfer", Scientifically both kind of marriages (involving Paternal or Maternal couples - incest inbreeding) are a BAD IDEA. WIll definitely increase the Chances of genetic disorders. – Vivikta Jun 17 '21 at 15:00
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    @Vivikta Well, why Baudhayana said that is difficult to answer for me. However, this article might help you. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s11407-021-09287-7 – Amritendu Mukhopadhyay Jun 17 '21 at 16:11
  • @Amritendu Mukhopadhyay: thank you for the answer. after reading the manu smriti for hours I agree with whatever you said. But I like to follow vedas & shaastras because they always have a logic & reason behind whatever is written. For example having dinner before sunset or the relationship between a soul & the universal soul. But the answers that I get on this question simply don't have any reasons or logic! As I said before also, I want to know the why part of this... It would be really appreciated if you could tell me why. Thanks – Ashish Srivastava Jun 18 '21 at 13:43
  • manusmriti 11.171 english translation seems incorrect. Sanskrit verses appear to refer to only paternal aunt & maternal aunt not their daughters. – ekAntika Feb 16 '23 at 17:11
  • there are 2 types of cousins - sagotra and non-sagotra. father's sister's son/daughter, and mother's brother's son/daughter are acceptable spouses. but this is only in dravida desh (below vindhyas), but not above it in aryavart. @Vivikta - you can ask rishis why they made this rule, same way why they made drinking OK for shudras but not for brahmins - do people have different biology - maybe they do. – ram Feb 17 '23 at 16:32
  • @AshishSrivastava the answer to your why part is genetic disorders. And it is scientifically proven thing. You said you have seen many with such kinds of marriages but having progeny without defects, it is so because it increases the chance of genetic defects and not like the child will have 100% chances of having genetic diseases but increased chance of having one. Manu smriti and all dharma shastras have their logic too, you just need to think about it. – Rudra Sep 04 '23 at 03:13
  • @AshishSrivastava Explain Gotras to us please. – Haridasa Feb 25 '24 at 14:18
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Boy marrying daughter of his maternal uncle or paternal uncle is evil as per shatapAtha brAhmaNa 1.8.3.5 & 1.8.3.6 :

5. Behind the juhu stands the sacrificer, and behind the upabhrit stands he who means evil to him: hereby, then, he brings the sacrificer forward to the front (or east), and the one who means evil him he drives back (or towards the west). Behind the juhu stands the eater (enjoyer), and behind the upabhrit the one to be eaten (enjoyed): thus he now brings the eater (enjoyer) to the front, and the one to be eaten (enjoyed) he drives back.

tadvā etat | samāna eva karmanvyākriyate tasmādu samānādeva puruṣādattā cādyaśca jāyate idaṃ hi caturthe puruṣe tṛtīye saṃgacāmaha iti videvaṃ dīvyamānā jātyā āsata etasmādu tat

Thus the separation (of the eater and the eaten) is effected in one and the same act; and hence from one and the same man spring both the enjoyer (the husband), and the one to be enjoyed (the wife): for now kinsfolk (gatyah) live sporting and rejoicing together, saying, “In the fourth man (or) third (i.e. generation) we unite.” And this is so in accordance with that (separation of the spoons).

Above 4/3 rule considers line of descent. Together with line of ascent this would result in 7/5 rule as mentioned in texts like viShNu purANa book 3 ch. X :

Let a householder marry a maiden who is in kin at least five degrees remote from his mother, and seven from his father, with the ceremonies enjoined by law

(i.e. 4+4-1 = 7 & 3+3-1 = 5)

yama dvitiya (Bhaubeej) festival, described in skanda purANa vaiShNava khanDa Kārttikamāsa-māhātmya ch. 11, considers daughter of maternal uncle as an alternative to sister:

25. In the absence of one’s own sister, one should go to the house of the sister of one’s father with respect and take food there.

If one has no younger sister, one shall go to the elder sister’s house. If she too does not exist, he should go to the abode of the married daughter of his paternal uncle.

In her absence, to the house of mother’s sister or to that of the maternal uncle’s daughter. The order of precedence shall be fixed on the basis of the relationships as the children of co-wives or of the same Gotra.

Marrying maternal uncle’s daughter was a curse to yadus & thus we have such marriages in case of krShna-nIlA, subhadrA-arjuna, pradyumna-rukmAvatI, aniruddha-rochanA :

padmapuraNa bhumI khanda ch.80

Yayāti, the lord of the earth, then cursed his son: “Since you have disobeyed (my) order, you, resembling a sinner, polluted by my curse, enjoy a portion of your mother”

Penance for such marriages is given in skandapurANa-brahmakhanDa-dharmaraNyakhanDa-ch21

19. After marrying the daughter of the maternal uncle as well as a daughter of the same Gotra as that of his mother, and a girl of the same Pravara (the man) should forsake her and perform Cāndrāyaṇa rite.

kashyapa marrying daughters of dakSha is not an example of cousin marriage answered here

ekAntika
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  • there are 2 types of cousins - sagotra and non-sagotra. father's sister's son/daughter, and mother's brother's son/daughter are acceptable spouses. but this is only in dravida desh (below vindhyas), but not above it in aryavart – ram Feb 17 '23 at 16:31
  • "paternal aunt daughter" in baudhyana appears to be a translation error from sanskrit verses (there is a similar verse in brahmavaivarta purana but without paternal aunt daughter). So, marrying paternal aunt daughter (non-sagotra) should be valid everywhere like krishna-mitravinda, krishna-brinda. Maternal uncle would be sapinda with groom hence prohibition (as boy also offers pinda to his maternal grandfather). baudhayana I-1-2.3 is only referring to mlecchas (non-brahmins) practice in dravidadesha. Dravida-brahmins (aryas) are expected to follow aryavart rules (baudhayana I-1-2.7-2.9) – ekAntika Feb 17 '23 at 18:22
  • the very word 'mama' is a short for mamanaar (father in law).. son marrying mama's daughter marrying mama herself is accepted. even orthodox brahmins in south india have done this practice, it is not prohibited but generally avoided. the reason to practice is that it is very hard for orthodox brahmin boys to find orthodox brahmin girls to marry, the latter usually preferring IT coolies. – ram Feb 17 '23 at 20:26
  • "very hard for orthodox brahmin boys..." - ya in times of distress practice is ok. "marrying..." - shastras dont prohibit other marriages which are similar to 'paternal aunt daughter' where groom and daughter-giver don't share same pinda ancestor. manu 11.171 is a translation error as sanskrit verses only talk about incest with paternal aunt and not "daughter of paternal aunt"...(continued) – ekAntika Feb 18 '23 at 16:48
  • (continued)...However all shastras prohibit maternal uncle daughter due to same pinda, south of vindhyas is a yadava zone as per harivamsa 2-59-13. Whether prohibition applies to south-brahmins or not, maybe sahyadrikhanDa of skanda purAna can answer this but its english translation is not available online, only sanskrit version is available online. – ekAntika Feb 18 '23 at 16:48
  • " even orthodox brahmins in south india..." - but narayanastra blogger has commented "south indians marry their cousins? Only non-brahmins do that" on this page - https://harekrishnarevolution.wordpress.com/2012/01/19/difference-between-the-devotees-of-krishna-and-shiva/ – ekAntika Feb 19 '23 at 11:31
  • of course, paternal-aunt is definitely not allowed, cos she is same gotra is your father (before marriage, of course). but maternal uncle is different gotra, maybe that's why it is allowed in some places. it is possible that rishis meant non-aryans when allowing cousin marriage south of vindhyas, and there is high rate of cousin marriage among non-brahmins in tamilnadu. but i have seen it happen in brahmin families too, who want to preserve vedic way of life, because marrying outside family causes much more trouble to their lifestyle than possible genetic imbalance lol. – ram Feb 20 '23 at 01:26