Asthi visarjan of one's father when one's mother is alive

Question

Can one do Asthi Visarjan of one's father when one's mother is still alive? Is it the case that one can't do asti visarjan until one's mother is alive?

Answer 1

This is an important part of antyeshti samskara. After offering the body to agni, the remnants should be collected in a pot and then disposed in a river if one is not able to do at ganga.

There is no such connection with either of the parent being alive or not. This is an important rite and has to be done as soon as possible.

The same is hinted in the passage of garuDa purANa

The son should make the grain oblation to the denizens of the burning-ground, and walk round three times, repeating the mantra beginning with "Yamāyatva."

Then having sprinkled milk over the place of the funeral pyre, O Lord of Birds, he should sprinkle water, and begin to pick up the heap of bones.

Having placed them on palasha leaves, he should sprinkle them with milk and water, and, having put them into an earthen pot, perform Śrāddha as prescribed.

Having prepared a triangular plot of ground, and cleansed it with cow-dung, he, facing south, should offer three rice-balls, in the three directions.

Having collected the ashes from the pyre, taking a three-legged stool he should place on it a jar with mouth uncovered, containing water.

Then he should make, for the departed, an oblation of cooked rice with curds and clarified butter, water and sweetmeats, as prescribed.

He should take fifteen steps in the northerly direction and, digging a hole there, place in it, O Bird, the jar of bones.

Then he should offer over it a rice-ball, which destroys the pain of burning, and, taking the vessel from the hole, carry it to a tank of water.

Then he should several times sprinkle the bones with water and milk, and worship them well, with sandal-paste and saffron.

Having put them into a leaf-box, touched with it his heart and head and walked round it saluting it; he should drop it into the middle of the Ganges.

79-84. He whose bones sink in the water of the Ganges within ten days, never returns from the world of Brahma.

As long as a man's bones float on the water of the Ganges,--for so many thousands of years he remains in the heaven-world.

When the wind which has touched the waves of the Ganges touches the dead, his sin is at once destroyed.

Having worshipped, with great austerities, the divine Ganges, for the uplifting of his forefathers, Bhagīratha 1brought her down from the world of Brahmā.

In the three worlds is celebrated the purifying fame of the Ganges, who led to heaven the sons of Sagara 2 who had been reduced to ashes.