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  • Wife at the time of husbands death wear white saree and does not put Kunkumam on her forehead.
  • She also does not participate in certain functions and seeing her is considered as a Bad Omen.
  • Husbands don't change their life style even in a small way.

QUESTION :

  • Why husbands don't change their dress code after wife's death like the women who wear white sarees after husbands' death ?
Sarvabhouma
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Sakthi
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    there is no such rule for a widow to make changes in dress etc. it was only introduced in later time .. during systems like sati. – Rakesh Joshi May 21 '17 at 06:47
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    what @RakeshJoshi says is false. the very word Sati is a name for Parvati, because she entered agni voluntarily. Only if Sati is forced it is wrong cos it's murder, but if the woman is willing, it is greatest display of chastity and brings great rewards in afterlife. Btw, there are many restrictions for men (widowers) too - they cannot do any yaga or homa or be main priest etc. only those with wife can perform these. So they were allowed to marry again in order to perform dharma. But for women, only one husband, so that even after death, she can join him in higher worlds. – ram May 21 '17 at 07:10
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    @ram I'm not sure how you are making connection between Devi Sati and Sati custom; because 1) Devi Sati didn't die because of death of her husband. 2) Devi Sati burnt herself from Yogãgni fire generated from her Chakras as I discuss here. – Tezz May 21 '17 at 11:50
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    There are restrictions on both the genders​. Some are visible and some are not. If the wife dies, husband can perform "kanyadaan". This is one example. According to Hinduism both men and woman are equal. I think it is the male domination that has lead to woman think that there are many rules on them compared to men. – Krishna Chaitanya May 22 '17 at 14:52
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    @ram Completely Wrong. The very word Sati which is name of the Universal Goddess means - "She who is Sat- id est, She who is of nature of Truth(Sat)" –  Sep 24 '17 at 16:18
  • @Tezz & Anurag Singh - i worded it wrong. The practice of sati referring to women joining the husband's funeral pyre was named after sati devi, because she was such a pativrata that she didn't want to be bodily related to those who insulted her husband. The custom was named after the devi, not the other way round. – ram Sep 24 '17 at 18:32

2 Answers2

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These rule (white dress on husband's death) and many other are set by humans (males) not by God! Males always prefers himself superior than females and with this arrogance of themselves they put lots of restriction on women in earlier time like...

  • They have to burn herself with husband's body.
  • Later they change a little and impose new rule on women that they have to wear white sari after husband's death.

These rules are imposed on women in name of Parmpara or dharma But actually these rules has nothing to do with dharma. How in the world a dress code can decide whether you are a Dharmatma or not lol.

Let me give you an example through which you will come to know that these rules (parampara) doesn't make a woman Dharmatma or anything like great.

Once Shree Ram said to Lakshman that Man can't be a saint or branhman by his birth but instead he can be by his karma (Deeds that man does). Even if you are son of a Maharish that doesn't make you also a Rishi but your karma will decide what you actually are... This is the reason, Maharishi Vishwamitra is know as the great Brahma Rishi instead of a great king (Vishwamitra is a son of a king) And Bhagwan Parshuram knows as Kshatriya more than Brahman (His father Maharishi Jamdagney was a Great Maharishi). Both of their karma was apposite of their father's that's why they are not famous for the same thing, for which their father was.

Hence your karma will decide what actually you are, not your birth or your father's karma. And to be more clear, Dress code (whether white sari or saint cloth) has nothing to do with karma or dharma.

Vishvam
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    I am not sure which book you read while making the statement "they have to burn herself...". If your knowledge of Hinduism is limited then please read. Not even one veda says that the wife has to be burned/buried with the husband. Infact, after Abhimanyu's death, Uttara tried to perform Sati. Lord Krishna intervened and stopped her since she was carrying Parikshit during that time. This proves that forcing woman into funeral pire was not a practice and secondly​, sati was also not forced on any woman. Infact most of the widowed woman from kurukshetra did not perform Sati. – Krishna Chaitanya May 22 '17 at 14:48
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    @KrishnaChaitanya It seems you didn't read my answer word to word. I clearly specified these are all restrictions that used to impose on women forcefully in early time in name of Parampra. The one person to step forward to stop these was Prahlad... When Narsingha Avatar killed hiranya kahsyap then her wife was preparing to get sati but when Prahlad (which was king right now) came to know about this then he questioned his mother that, why u want to do this? Is all your duties is towards your husband only? what about your duties as mother? if you die then who will [contine...] – Vishvam May 22 '17 at 17:17
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    @KrishnaChaitanya perform all rest of your duties? He confront his mother to give up her decision of being sati and stoped this parampara forever. He passed an order as king that this paramparaa is now being stopped once and for all. Sati pratha has nothing to do with dhrama that I have already clearly mentioned in my answer. – Vishvam May 22 '17 at 17:18
  • No you clearly mentioned "...put lot of restrictions on women in earlier time....". There was never a rule set to kill the women After the husband's demise. If it is a rule, written in any veda please point it. I agree You mentioned that sati has nothing to do with Dharma. But your answer gives a meaning that our elders had set a rule to kill the wife. If it is a rule it should be documented in vedas or any ancient Hindu scripture. – Krishna Chaitanya May 23 '17 at 08:40
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    @KrishnaChaitanya First line of my answer is "These rules is set by humans (males ) not by GOD". And vedas are created by God. I also mentioned in my second line that "ARROGANCE of man created these kinds of rules and forcefully imposed on women". – Vishvam May 23 '17 at 09:14
  • @KrishnaChaitanya READ first paragraph again carefuly – Vishvam May 23 '17 at 09:25
  • What do you mean by earlier time. Do you mean Vedic period? I am not sure and not heard of any of our ancestors practicing this – Krishna Chaitanya May 23 '17 at 09:27
  • @KrishnaChaitanya By earlier time my mean that time where these kinds of Pratha used to exist. I used this word "earlier time" because I was not sure what was that time when these kinds of inhuman Pratha use to follow by people otherwise I would have mentioned name of the time also. – Vishvam May 23 '17 at 09:48
  • @KrishnaChaitanya Not even one veda says that the wife has to be burned/buried with the husband. A huge lot of Scriptures says(yes say's') - A wife should burn herself after death of husband. Do not say anything. –  May 29 '17 at 17:01
  • @KrishnaChaitanya Agni Purana 222.19-23, Kurma Purana 2.34.108-109, Garuda Purana 1.107.29, Garuda Purana 2.4.88-97, Brahma Purana 10.75 , Brahmanda Purana 2.3.30.39 , Padma Purana V.106.60, Skanda Purana III.ii.7.53-56, Parasara Smriti 4.28 , Brihaspati Smriti 24.11, Daksa Smrti 4.18-19, Vishnu Smriti 25.14. All of these and many others promote Sati Pratha –  May 29 '17 at 17:12
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    @Anuragsingh Does our vedas says that It is mandatory for every woman to burn herself with husband's body? Just for curiosity. – Vishvam May 29 '17 at 17:25
  • @Rishabh Vedas have no mention of Sati. Actually, the Vedas do not even have any rules or procedures or practices. They mostly have Yagya procedures and mantras. The Puraanas, Smriti, et cetera, contain these practices. But this also does not mean that Puraanas are to be ignored in front of Vedas. –  May 30 '17 at 15:47
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    @AnuragSingh You are saying vedas don't mention this pratha. That's exactly what I said in my answer that these pratha are not created by God but created by humans. God rules are thoughts are in vedas in which no such pratha is being promoted. – Vishvam May 30 '17 at 15:55
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    @Rishabh Then you mean to say- only Veda are created by God, Puraanas et cetera are man made. Veda do not even mention many Gods in Hinduism. Many spiritual rituals are not in Vedas. So how can we say- Puranas are not God created –  May 30 '17 at 19:09
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    @Rishabh Brahma Purana 10.75 ”Dying Immediately after the husband is the greatest duty of women. This is the path laid down in the Vedas.The woman who follows her husband shall stay in heaven for as many years as there are hairs in a man’s body, viz. three and a half crores of years." –  May 30 '17 at 19:13
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    @Rishabh As you see above, Sati Pratha is glorified in our Shaastras. Even though Vedas do not mention any hint of Sati, this does not mean Sati is a man-made thing. The real reason for sati was- for a widow women at that earlier time, it was hard to live without Husband. Re-marriage did not suit the good ladies. Moreover, at that times the Husbands used to really be "Husbands", not just like today's lusty man. So it was better she burnt her. And doing this was actually a great deed by that Heroic Woman who burns herself. And She did then get thousands of years in heaven. –  May 30 '17 at 19:20
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The dress code for widow female or male to avoid sex attraction before remarriage in early young age. Female attraction is powerful then males. But in North India males and females wares white dress during Hindu rituals. At lost both has to die on the earth. This is final destination.

Nelanuthula Krishna Prasad
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    Not sure if you are answering the question or want to comment on the question, if you are answering it then please do elaborate along with some references. – Just_Do_It Feb 28 '18 at 14:17