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I'm attending a talk that will be given by a professor that runs a social-cognitive development lab at our school, and the topic will be about his work that attempts to explain why women are less represented in STEM fields and how early in life this occurs.

I suspect that plenty of STEM faculty and students will attend; moreover, I expect there to be uncomfortable topics regarding gender and race.

To what extent should I participate in question and answer with the speaker, if I see my own colleagues in the audience? I would like to participate actively if I feel I have something interesting to add but that could necessarily be a question about gender and race.

user83667
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    You are basically asking "Should I ask this question?" --- well, it depends on the question, on the content of the seminar, on the audience. It's difficult to give an answer in general, I am afraid. – Federico Poloni Nov 30 '17 at 07:23
  • @noahsnyder you approved and pushed for the reopening of the transgender women in math question, then why would you vote to close this question? I don't get you. – user83667 Nov 30 '17 at 14:13
  • Do you have any goal or criteria that could render this question answerable? – Wrzlprmft Nov 30 '17 at 14:14
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    @user83667: Said question and this one have very little in common except being about gender, so why should decisions about their closure be correlated? – Wrzlprmft Nov 30 '17 at 14:19
  • @wrzlprmft, both questions are similar in that both ask about how to approach dialogue about gender issues in STEM safely. The closure of this question makes it seem that when Herero men ask for advice on safe dialogue it is ignored but when someone is LGBT and asks for advice there are good answers provided and the question remains open. Straight men need to / want to learn about safe dialogue too, and when you remove that, one less group of people learn about these issues in STEM. – user83667 Nov 30 '17 at 14:49
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    ask about how to approach dialogue about gender issues in STEM safely – Well, to start with you never said anything about safety or what your intentions are. Hence my first comment and hence probably the closure. — when Herero men ask for advice on safe dialogue it is ignored – Unless I missed something, you did not specify or even hint at your gender or sexual orientation (not that you have to). – Wrzlprmft Nov 30 '17 at 15:08
  • @wrzlprmft I think my last paragraph very clearly conveys a concern of safety; that I would have to jump through so many hoops than someone who initially declares himself or herself a trans-person to get a productive and important dialogue going is ridiculous. I apologize for not being a trans-person, but I do genuinely have a question about safe dialogue, which is clearly asked above. I will not revise it any more. – user83667 Nov 30 '17 at 15:53
  • Honestly, I don't understand why this question has been closed. Voting to reopen. – Mad Jack Nov 30 '17 at 16:03
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    I voted to close as “unclear what you’re asking” and I stand by that. I can’t figure out what you’re asking. Also I’m not sure why you think it was obvious that you’re a “hetero man” and I’m ignoring you for that reason when your question says nothing about who you are. – Noah Snyder Nov 30 '17 at 16:54
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    @noahsnyder so you can't figure out from the last paragraph what I am trying to ask? hoops, Noah, I get it. I apologize for not declaring in my question that I am LGBT; somehow that declaration would magically make you understand the question being asked and would result in helpful answers and comments. – user83667 Nov 30 '17 at 18:23
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    @user83667 Welcome to AC.SE. Please take a look at our [help]. I also do not understand your question. Please be considerate to our users, they are in fact trying to help you get an answer. I am not sure what the transgender women in math question is, but in general we frown upon using the existence of a single question as justification for why another question should be allowed. – StrongBad Nov 30 '17 at 23:15
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    @user83667 In reference to my answer, jumping immediately from your question not being accepted to "I would have to jump through so many hoops than someone who initially declares himself or herself a trans-person to get a productive and important dialogue going is ridiculous. I apologize for not being a trans-person..." would be an example of what not to do. – Fomite Dec 01 '17 at 01:30
  • Coincidentally, a few days later, this question asked about a very similar topic by a male asker (of unknown sexual orientation) did not receive a single close vote but was very well received. Maybe you should start considering that your question was closed because it was really unclear. — I think my last paragraph very clearly conveys a concern of safety – Honestly, what makes you think so? You neither use this word, nor a synonym, nor any other word or phrase somehow related to the topic of safety. – Wrzlprmft Dec 03 '17 at 09:26

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I have been to seminars like that, including ones where large numbers of my colleagues are present.

So long as you have meaningful and productive questions (i.e. don't ask a question for the sake of asking one) and ask them as respectfully as you would any other topic, there isn't a problem.

I will note that choosing not to attend is also sending a message, and in the seminar I was in, a number of colleagues expressed disappointment that the room was nearly entirely women (in this case it was about the status of women in the field).

Fomite
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