Phrasing of refuah prayer when praying for a non-Jew

Question

How would you phrase a refuah (recovery from illness) tefillah (prayer) for a sick gentile?

"Thomas ben [=son of] Mary"?

"Thomas Smith"?

Is it appropriate to include the name during the misheberachs (public prayer for sick people) in the synagogue? I have occasionally heard misheberachs for English-sounding names, but had assumed that was because the Hebrew name was not known.

Sometimes, English names in Misheberachs refer to Jews who have only an English name. — Isaac Moses, Feb 25 '11 at 17:22

score 11 · Answer 1 · edited Jun 19 '14 at 13:08

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You use their name and their fathers name.

Source: When asked to pray for non-Jews, the Lubavitcher Rebbe would always request their name and their father's name. See here.

edited Jun 19 '14 at 13:08

Yishai

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answered Sep 18 '11 at 20:18

HodofHod

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This appears to be ONLY the opinion of Dinka Kumer, on the ChaBad website... I do not see where the Lubavitcher Rebbe come into this discussion. He ie NEITHER named, nor referred to. Please cite your authority for your statement about the Lubavitcher Rebbe. – Yerucham David ben Mordecai Jul 08 '18 at 06:20
The answer is reprinted on Chabad.org from AskMoses.org. Both of these websites have editorial review and do not publish things that aren't authoritative. 2) Here is their page on how to send a letter to the Ohel.

HodofHod

Jul 08 '18 at 06:34

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@HodofHod So it's the opinion of the editor. It doesn't say that the Rebbe would ask for the father's name. – ertert3terte Jul 08 '18 at 06:48

There is NO REFERENCE to the Lubavitcher Rebbe, one way or another. MY POINT is that Dinka Kamer makes NO mention of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, nor any reference to him. MY POINT is simply that there is NO basis for naming the Lubavitcher Rebbe as a source. (This has nothing to do with the name of the sick person.) FURTHER you did not cite AskMoses.org, – Yerucham David ben Mordecai Jul 08 '18 at 08:39

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@YeruchamDavidbenMordecai There are many known stories where the Rebbe would ask for the father’s name when Davening on behalf of a non-Jew. מענה בכפ״ח גל׳ 760. ר״ד מחלוקת דולרים יום ראשון, כ״א אייר תנש״א. וכ״ה בתפלה לשלום המלכות בכמה סידורים (פב״פ). וכ״ה בגוכתי״ק אדה״ז בס׳ הסידור ע׳ קסט – פיטראוויץ, היינו בנו של פיטר. וראה בסידור הרב דפו״ר ע׳ 458 הערה 118. – Yehoshua Levy May 09 '22 at 20:52

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@ertert3terte it wasn’t the opinion of the author. – Yehoshua Levy May 09 '22 at 20:53

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@YehoshuaLevy I saw a few times that you are adding many sources to other people's answers. Sources are great, but massive edits to other answers are generally rejected. Best is to write your own answer with the same content. Welcome again and glad to see you seem to be enjoying, typically takes a bit of time to get used fully to the informal rules here. – mbloch May 10 '22 at 03:24

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@mbloch thanks Ill avoid major edits, thanks for the polite message – Yehoshua Levy May 10 '22 at 04:22

@YehoshuaLevy I am trying to look up what you cite: "There are many known stories where the Rebbe would ask for the father’s name when Davening on behalf of a non-Jew. מענה בכפ״ח גל׳ 760. ר״ד מחלוקת דולרים יום ראשון, כ״א אייר תנש״א. וכ״ה בתפלה לשלום המלכות בכמה סידורים (פב״פ). וכ״ה בגוכתי״ק אדה״ז בס׳ הסידור ע׳ קסט – פיטראוויץ, היינו בנו של פיטר. וראה בסידור הרב דפו״ר ע׳ 458 הערה 118". The opening quote is incomplete. The Dollar Distribution isn't printed to my knowledge. Specifically what "Siddur HaRav" are you citing and what page. Thank you for your help. – Yaacov Deane Jul 05 '23 at 15:43

score 10 · Answer 2 · edited Jun 19 '14 at 13:09

The Ben Ish Chai (in Torah Lishmah) says that there are two reasons why we pray for someone ben his mother:

Women have less sins (they don't have the commandment to learn Torah constantly, which is a sin that everyone violates to some degree every single day.)
We know for a fact who is the mother, while not 100% for sure who is the father.

According to the first reason, we could say a mishebeirach after either (the 7 commandments are not time-related, and obligatory on both men and women equally). According to the second reason, even by a non-jew one should say a mishebeirach after the mother.

R' Zevin (A Treasury of Chassidic Tales) wrote that when Count Dravski went to the grave of R' Menachem Mendel of Rimanov he wrote a Pidyon Nefesh and he signed it as "Miechislav Dravski the son of Victoria".

Though hodofhod pointed out that chabad.org says a non-jew should use the father's name when writing a Pidyon Nefesh by the grave of a tzaddik.

What difference does it make what the gentile count did in the story? You can’t poskin an halacha from Maaseh Count only Maaseh Rav. — Yehoshua Levy, May 09 '22 at 21:23
You’re reasoning based on the Ben Ish Chai is very interesting, however see this psak. — Yehoshua Levy, May 09 '22 at 21:26

sam · Answer 3 · 2018-12-13T14:28:41.150

When the governer of Connecticut was sick the Vaad HaRabbanim wanted to know if they can say a mi shebeirach for him . They asked Rav Soloveitchik and Rav Soloveitchik said they can and gave them a nusach to use. He also noted that they should use his name and the name of his family (last name) .

Text of nusach:

ויתפלל אברהם אל האלקים וירפא אלקים את אבימלך ואת אשתו" "ואמוהתיו וילדו , הוא יברך וירפא את החולה... [name of person and family name] בעבור שאנחנו מתפללים בעבורו , הקדוש ברוך הוא ימלא רחמים עליו להחלימו ולרפאותו ולהחזירו ולהחיותו וישלח לו מהרה רפואה שלמה רפואת הנפש רפואת הגוף ונאמר אמן."

Source: Shu"t Hashoel 2:pg.126

score 4 · Accepted Answer · answered Feb 25 '11 at 17:40

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To your first question:

My guess would be that there's no reason to classify non-Jews' relationships with their mothers as any different than Jews' relationships with theirs, and that therefore the same formula would apply.

answered Feb 25 '11 at 17:40

Isaac Moses

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i would disagree with that because a jewish mother is very important because she is the reason he is jewish(except a ger but we don't say their mothers names anyway). – shlomo Feb 25 '11 at 21:45
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... and a non-Jewish man's mother is the reason he's not Jewish! – Isaac Moses Feb 27 '11 at 13:56

score 3 · Answer 5 · answered Dec 29 '11 at 00:22

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One should not include non-Jews in the regular MiSheBerach as the prayer states: בתוך שאר חולי ישראל to heal X son of X among the other sick of Israel. The non-Jew is not in this category and should thus be prayed for separately.

answered Dec 29 '11 at 00:22

Double AA

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Makes sense. Does some authority say as much? – msh210 Dec 29 '11 at 00:32
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@msh210 I just made it up after reading the question. But I think it makes sense. – Double AA Dec 29 '11 at 01:44
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Why shouldn't a non-Jew be healed among the remaining sick of Israel? – Charles Koppelman Jul 16 '12 at 18:42
@CharlesKoppelman Why can't I drink a Wednesday? He's more than welcome to be healed at the same time as the sick of Israel, but I don't think 'among' is the correct preposition. – Double AA Jul 16 '12 at 18:45
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"Among" (בתוך ) could mean "interspersed with", though. God will dwell "among" Israel (Ex 25:8), but that doesn't mean God is part of Israel or vice-versa. So -- speculation alert -- non-Jews who dwell among Jews might warrant being included even if totally-separate non-Jews don't. – Monica Cellio Jul 16 '12 at 18:51
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@MonicaCellio I'm a little skeptical of betoch signifying locational proximity because all the Jewish communities around the world are not in locational proximity to each other but are still included. – Double AA Jul 18 '12 at 16:38
Maybe if you left out שאר? https://he.wikisource.org/wiki/%D7%A9%D7%95%D7%9C%D7%97%D7%9F_%D7%A2%D7%A8%D7%95%D7%9A_%D7%99%D7%95%D7%A8%D7%94_%D7%93%D7%A2%D7%94_%D7%A9%D7%9C%D7%94_%D7%95 – Double AA Oct 05 '20 at 17:03

score 1 · Answer 6 · answered Feb 25 '11 at 17:39

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If you know the non Jews mothers name then you should say Thomas ben Mary. If you do not know his mothers name then you should say his name the way you know it.

answered Feb 25 '11 at 17:39

Gershon Gold

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Source?_________ – HodofHod Dec 28 '11 at 20:24

score 0 · Answer 7 · answered Jan 27 '12 at 04:31

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Neither. The Gemara in Berachot 34 says that when one prays for his friend he doesn't have to mention his name. On the contrary, Rebi Nahman MiBreslev said not to says one's name when the 'dinim - judgments' are overtaking him (e.g. when he is sick or in need of any prayer).

answered Jan 27 '12 at 04:31

Hacham Gabriel

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Yet common practice AFAIK (perhaps not among Breslovers, though) is to use a name when praying for sick people. – msh210 Jan 27 '12 at 04:44
@msh210 but I think the source for this is in the Kitve HaAri as well, but I'm not sure. There are some people that do Hashkava after the first year of death even though that is Mazik. – Hacham Gabriel Jan 27 '12 at 04:47
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I thought that only applies when you are davening for someone next to you? – ertert3terte Jan 27 '12 at 05:22

score 0 · Answer 8 · answered Dec 16 '13 at 18:44

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We recite a misheberach cholim (a prayer for the sick) in our congregation after reading the 5th Torah aliyah. We include the names of both Jews and non-Jews. Ir we know the Hebrew name of the Jew we use that, otherwise we use their given name.

answered Dec 16 '13 at 18:44

Steve Bernstein

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Hi Steve! We don't know you or your congregation so this answer is not very helpful. What congregation do you attend? Do they attempt to follow Halacha? Upon whose guidance was the decision made to include non-Jews in the prayer by name? – Double AA Dec 16 '13 at 18:49

score 0 · Answer 9 · answered Jul 12 '11 at 17:05

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I heard that if you don't know the sick person's name, it is enough if you just focus your mind on the sick person and Hashem will know who you mean. So, if you know an English first-name, that would be fine as well.

answered Jul 12 '11 at 17:05

zaq

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provide a source please – Adam Mosheh Oct 08 '13 at 21:57

Phrasing of refuah prayer when praying for a non-Jew

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